iNoxious.

"Can I use your phone for a second? I have to make a call."

"Yeah, brah. Did I tell you I got a new one?"

"Nah."

"Man. It's an iPhone. It's fucking sick. You know I had the old one right?"

"Not really, no."

"Oh, yeah, the 3g is even better than that."

"What's the 3g?"

"The new iPhone. It's fucking sick."

"Can I make that call?"

"Yeah bro. It has GoogleMaps. It's badass."

"Cool."

"You have to get one. Fuck Chocolate's. Chocolate's suck. So do Helio's. Go iPhone, dude. It's vicious."

"Sounds like it.
So I can I make that call?"

"Oh, yeah. My bad, bro.
And you take a picture with this button. Since it's a wide screen you can see it before you take it. Most of the pictures come out better than they do on other phones."

"Cool.
Where do I dial the number again?"

"Dude, want to watch Jackass on YouTube?
Did I tell you it has YouTube too? I love Johnny Knoxville. That time he got gored by the bull in the movie was so extreme."

"Can you just dial the number for me, then?"

"Don't bother with Helio's. They break so much. My homie has one and he's always fixing some shit about it.
Don't make the same mistake he did, bro. Go iPhone.

I'm just playing, dawg. For real, though, you should get an iPhone. So fucking worth it. I don't think I've spent money so well since I got my tattoo."

"When'd you get a tattoo?"

"Last week, dude. You didn't see this shit yet?
It's fucking bad. I saw it on a Famous shirt, so I bought the shirt and took it to the shop and they inked that shit straight in. Took three hours for that motherfucker."

"Nice. Is it ringing yet?"

"Nah bro, I gotta' close all the windows first. You've never even used one of these?"

"No."

"It's ringing."

"Should I avoid touching the screen?"

"Don't trip, dude. Shits' straight."

...ring...ring...ring.

...blah...blah...blah.

click.

"Thanks for letting me use it."

"No problem. Do yourself a favor and get one. My homie can hook your ass up real tight. I got this shit, like, half-price."

"That's cool. Hey, take it easy man."

"Yeah bro. Fuck dem' bitches, you hear?"